I have been a bit of a gamer for as long as I can remember. I'm talking far back... back to the 80's and a Commodore 64 that required a long wait for the mere loading of games off of a floppy disk (remember those?) or much worse, from a cassette tape. In the 90s I would go over to my friends' houses to play the original Nintendo until I one-upped them with a Super Nintendo that I got for Christmas from my parents. That was later pushed aside by the first console I ever bought for myself; the coveted Nintendo 64. In the year 2000, the world survived the millennium bug and the Playstation 2 was released. There was just no way I could go without having one of those! Then Microsoft jumped on board and began production of the XBOX so it was adios PS2. The next logical progression from there was the Xbox 360...and that brings us up to date.
I had only had the Xbox 360 a year and a half when it showed ill fated signs of the dreaded 'red ring of death'! For those who are not in the know, that basically meant your XBOX was experiencing a general error and that if it turned out to be irreparable and out of warranty then it meant saying bye-bye to your gaming console. Unfortunately, my console was among those considered not worthy of a repair. I had been playing it less and less, and just decided to retire it. I didn't really make a big deal out of it; I was more concerned about watching movies on the console than playing games on it. Besides, considering the time and money I've spent on consoles over the years, it was probably for the best.
Everything was going just great. I was busy with work and I had met a great new girl so video games were really the last thing on my mind. I had a few friends that had started playing Battlefield III online and told me that I should get involved and be a part of their platoon. But that was not enough to change my mind. It wasn't until I saw a trailer for Skyrim at the cinema that I knew I might be in a bit of trouble. At first I thought it was just a movie trailer, and then I saw the "now on Xbox 360" message at the bottom of the viewing screen. I was overwhelmed! Even my girlfriend, who was sitting next to me at the time, said "Wow that looks epic". What else could I do except take the plunge and purchase a new console? I went down to my local gaming store during the week, bought an Xbox 360, a few games including Battlefield III and Skyrim, a nice headset for chatting with my friends, and an XBOX Live subscription. It was a fair sized bundle which cost me nearly a thousand dollars but it was totally worth it! Or so I thought?
I warned my partner that this might be last time she would see me for a few months. She thought that I was joking and at the time I thought I was joking too, but after some time passed, I actually started to worry. I would occasionally check the clock which is located on the menu of the console, and discover I had spent the entire day doing nothing but play games to level up! I tried to convince myself it was justifiable; I told myself, "hey you work hard, you did go to the gym to work out a little this week, so you should not feel guilty about some game time." But then I considered what I could have accomplished elsewhere in the same amount of time and it actually made me feel a little depressed. I could have done a little more work, something that I actually get paid for? I could have used the time to produce new content for my blog. But, there I was, with nothing to show for all that time spent but some Skyrim dragon bones, and a rank of sergeant in Battlefield III.
Apart from being unproductive I also realised that I was neglecting more important things. If I were halfway through a new level, I would neglect doing necessary chores so I could play on in the game. I would also miss out on catch up time with my friends thanks to staying up so late playing games the night before, leaving me too tired or without any desire to go anywhere. But worst of all I wasn't giving my partner the time and attention that she deserved. I am fortunate in that my girlfriend enjoys playing games too; while I battle Skyrim dragons, she fiddles around with her Sims characters. But I realized how awful I had behaved when she needed a favor or something; little things like taking out the trash or helping with dinner or something, I would place the game above everything else, even tho I could have paused it at any time.
The Solution
In moderation, gaming is a great way to relieve stress. It gives you a chance to leave real life behind for a while and be the marine, the dragon slayer, the hero. There are no deadlines, no meetings, and no office politics. The big keyword is 'moderation'. How much time in front of your games is too much time? The answer to that depends on your unique situation. If you are involved in a relationship, then how much time you should spend gaming should be discussed with your partner. You have to compromise and arrive at a solution that is acceptable for everyone involved. How about playing just a few times a week for a few hours at a time? If you play games with your friends online, maybe have a night designated for games with your mates and make sure your partner knows about it in advance. Your partner must understand that your game playing time is important to you; it helps you unwind and destress. But you can still let them know you care about and appreciate them with a night out occasionally or spending one on one time with them.
For most of us playing games is just a hobby like woodworking or stamp collecting but for others a gaming addiction can be a serious problem. How do you know if you are a gaming addict? If you respond with a "yes" to any of the following questions, you might have a bigger gaming problem than you realise.
When you aren't playing games are you still constantly thinking about them?Do you need to spend more time playing games to get the same level of satisfaction you used to from just a few hours?It is a challenge for you to put down the game controller?Do you become agitated and irritable when you are unable to play games?Do you lie to you friends and family about the time you spend playing games?Fortunately there is help available. You can start by talking with friends and family, but if that is uncomfortable for you, there are actually clinics and centres that offer assistance similar to that for alcohol or drug abuse. Many times, playing games is simply a way to avoid dealing and coping with other problems.
We have all been in a rut, locked in a pattern of circumstances that we can't seem to get out of. Sometimes, those circumstances change by themselves, but more often we need to take action to ensure that we don't become stuck in a rut. We aim to help you get out of a rut knowing they can affect any facet of life.
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